Sanctuary Domain Forum - Recent Posts

RE: Have you ever been jealous of another man's life?

FifthLimbTim — Sat, 24 Oct 2026 13:06:16 +0000

Another attitude that gradually developed in me, not sure if it was related to the timing of my involvement in men's groups (MKP and others), is the notion that we are all on the same Male Team, and so seeing another man's enviable attribute is actually "scoring points" for our team. Part of my camming is that I feel I owe it to my fellow men to show them what I have. Idealism fuels it all. I "get off" on seeing my brothers embody masculinity. The saying that "iron sharpens iron" motivates me to hijack the competitive spirit for mutual enjoyment. I have reached my maximum weight and I am mad about it. My ideal demands that I take action to change toward my ideal. When I video chat on BW, I close the cams of the guys who don't care how fat they get. I think I privately coined the term sexercise long before any commercial enterprise. I do accept what I have to, but keep aiming for better, for me it's the masculine way! Perhaps my Dad's body attitude made me this way.

RE: What have you always wanted to ask another man?

Tony-Admin — Sat, 24 Oct 2026 11:13:03 +0000

@fifthlimbtim I think what you said about never feeling safe enough to ask Buddy resonates most with me. You were friends for years, yet you still wanted to understand something about his experience that you couldn't quite bring yourself to ask. I can certainly relate to that.

And I think that's something a lot of men experience, particularly when we're younger. We're curious about each other, but we're also terribly conscious of how that curiosity might be interpreted. Sometimes the fear of asking a perfectly innocent question becomes a bigger obstacle than the question itself.

Your comment about being self-conscious because you were uncut also caught my attention. It's remarkable how early we start worrying about whether our bodies measure up to everyone else's. And how often we assume we're the only ones feeling that way!

I keep wondering how many conversations we missed out on simply because we were afraid of what another guy might think. I know I've had my share of those moments, and I suspect a few of those questions are still rattling around in my head decades later. 🙂

Thanks for sharing this, buddy. It's exactly the kind of curiosity about other men's experiences that I hoped this discussion would bring out.

RE: Have you ever been jealous of another man's life?

Tony-Admin — Sat, 24 Oct 2026 11:10:46 +0000

@fifthlimbtim Well, even if it was just the chin, being compared to Brad Pitt isn't a bad thing! 😂

But I keep coming back to what you said about the change being gradual. I think that's been true for me, too. There are things I would have given anything for when I was younger that barely matter to me now. Of course, I still catch myself looking at another guy and thinking, "Damn, wouldn't mind having some of that!"

I do wonder, though, whether we actually become happier with what we have as we get older, or whether we simply get better at making peace with what we don't. Maybe a little of both. 🙂

RE: Have you ever been jealous of another man's life?

FifthLimbTim — Sat, 24 Oct 2026 11:04:09 +0000

It was a gradual shift. I dated a handful of women, the last around 2000. I was taken aback when she said I looked like Brad Pitt, until she explained that it was the dimple in my chin.

Totally unrelated to that, 2000 was also the year I had my last wet dream: Me on my back and a woman riding me, her boobs swinging at my face.

RE: What have you always wanted to ask another man?

FifthLimbTim — Sat, 24 Oct 2026 10:57:21 +0000

Yes, and I was friends with Buddy until I moved away in 8th grade, and it never felt safe to ask about his viewpoint. He was the youngest of five brothers and was more of a sissy than I was. He came out later. The risk of not getting a positive response was just too great. He was Catholic, as many of the boys in the neighborhood, and I wonder if any of them were abused and kept quiet.

I asked AI a few months ago if it thought I may have been part of some kind of study, or if it was a common physical, after giving the same detailed description, it justified each action and gave plausible reasons for each, and that it was a common physical for that age and time. It would have been equally fun if my Dad or another male relative were to have done those things, but having a stranger authority figure do it was also a bit of a rush.

I was generally penis-shy that year at school. The teacher used to take the whole class to the lavatory (restrooms) at the same time to get it over with instead of the constant interruption of one kid after another raising their hand to be excused. While other boys would have pissing contests to see who could pee the farthest at the urinals, and other comparing, I was so afraid that they would make fun of my uncut that I always shielded it with my hands. In my heart of hearts I wanted to play and see what I could.

RE: What have you always wanted to ask another man?

Tony-Admin — Sat, 24 Oct 2026 10:15:58 +0000

@proud-archer

That's interesting, Proud Archer! You got me curious enough to dig a little into the history of school physicals. Turns out, it varied a lot depending on where and when you went to school.

I even found a historical study describing group examinations where kids were partially undressed for posture and scoliosis checks. Some school physicals also included hernia and genital examinations, although I couldn't find much documentation about how common those were.

So it's entirely possible we simply went to schools with very different practices. What I find fascinating is that something Tim and I remember so vividly might never have been part of your experience at all. Same generation, very different memories. Makes me wonder what other childhood experiences we assume everyone shared, only to discover they didn't!

RE: What have you always wanted to ask another man?

Proud Archer — Sat, 24 Oct 2026 02:50:57 +0000

@fifthlimbtim Tim, you've just brought back a memory I haven't thought about in years!

I vividly remember those school physicals, too. Several of us boys were in the nurse's office together, shirts off, pants and underwear around our ankles, while they went through the examinations, including checking our privates and looking at our spines. It's funny how clearly I can still picture the whole scene after all these years.

I am a little younger than you two are @fifthlimbtim and @tony-admin, but not much younger. I went to public school in the northeastern United States. I never had an examination like that.

It’s possible that I simply don’t remember, or I blocked the memory, but I don’t think so. I think I would have remembered something like that.

RE: What have you always wanted to ask another man?

Tony-Admin — Fri, 23 Oct 2026 23:32:40 +0000

@fifthlimbtim

Tim, you really do have a remarkable memory! :) What interests me most is how differently we remember similar experiences, and how much meaning we attach to them over the years.

Your story raises another question for me, related to the source question. Did you ever want to ask Ricky, Jimmy, or Buddy what they thought about the experience afterward? And if so, what kept you from asking?

I wonder how many of us have carried questions about other men's experiences for years, simply because we weren't sure how they'd react if we asked.

Have you ever hesitated to ask another man something because you worried he’d misunderstand your curiosity?

Tony-Admin — Fri, 23 Oct 2026 23:21:20 +0000

Sometimes the questions we're most curious about are the hardest to ask.

Have you ever wanted to ask another man something personal, perhaps about his experiences, his body, his sexuality, his relationships, or simply how he thinks and feels, but hesitated because you weren't sure how he'd interpret your curiosity?

Many of us have probably wondered whether a perfectly genuine question might be misunderstood. Sometimes it's embarrassment, sometimes it's fear of judgment, and sometimes we simply don't know how to begin a conversation that feels a little more personal than usual.

I'd love to explore those moments here, not necessarily the questions themselves, but what makes them difficult to ask. Perhaps you've had an experience where someone welcomed your curiosity, or a conversation that surprised you by how naturally it unfolded.

There's no expectation to share anything deeply personal or reveal something you'd rather keep private. You can speak from your own experience, offer a general observation, or simply follow along.

I'm interested in what happens when men give one another a little more room to be curious, without immediately attaching assumptions or expectations to that curiosity.

Sometimes a question is just a question. And sometimes being comfortable enough to ask it is where a meaningful conversation begins.

RE: What have you always wanted to ask another man?

FifthLimbTim — Fri, 23 Oct 2026 17:51:03 +0000

Ever after, I would re-enact the moves with my own hands, as much as possible.
In total:
I was first in line, with Ricky, Jummy, and Buddy to my left. We were cool with shirts off, that was routine. But shoes and pants off, and pull down undershorts? Jimmy asked "How far?" The doctor repllied "Down to your knees is fine." So we all dropped them to our knees sheepishly.
The doctor was sitting on one of those rolling stools.
He rolls over to me and uses the stethoscope on my chest as usual and back and breathing and coughing. He had a clipboard and a form to fill out so he then jotted something down.
As for the not-so-privates, I am uncut, so first he peeled back my foreskin behind the head, saw that it was looking normal, and retracted easily. Then he took the head between his thumb and forefinger and pulled.
In all my penis play, I had never tried that, so it felt new and interesting. It lengthened, he held it out at full extent a moment and then let go and it fell long and lanky, not the least bit harder.
Then he wrote down some stuff and then he firmly squeezed my shaft with his hand, let go, and saw no unusual response. I never got hard at that age, (unlike some boys I found out about years later, which utterly fascinated and dumbfounded me.)
Then he gently squeezed my left testis and asked me if it hurt at all. When I said yes, he said to point to where it hurt, and I pointed at my lower abdomen. He then repeated that for the right testis, with the same result. The usual finger in the sack and turn head and cough on each side also.
Then after he wrote something down, he took his thumb and index finger and made an "OK" ring shape as he enclosed my entire package, dick and balls, and once enclosed, gave the whole package a firm tug, which I had never done and also felt interesting. As all this was going on, the other boys were not toeing the line, but had curved around to see what would be done to them after me. I also wanted to see them get handled, but I was not able to see much, as their parts weren't as big and harder to see.
In hindsight, the pulling awakened something deep in my phallic identity.
In the next months I fantasized about an ideal world where all men and boys could frolic naked and handle each other any way they wanted, as long as it was enjoyed by all. I even gave this paradise a name, Penisia, pronounced "penis-see-ya". I longed for buddies to do that kind of thing with ever since.
I still have some of my personal records from that elementary school and one where that doctor signed his name, so I looked online and found old newspaper articles about him. I thought "lucky bastard', to get paid to handle and get a good look at all these boys! Other men have gone to prison for less! I doubt my parents ever knew about it. So as you said, what would they think? Today, it would be unthinkable.